JourneyOfALostMind

Expressions of Louis J.

Everything that i had ever felt, was only but a mirage to the fact that everything i wanted was unattainable. 

As soon as i took the step into the nothingness i was left with everything i was walking from.

 I wanted love but i rejected it. 

I wanted acceptance but i denied it.

I wanted light but i chose darkness.

 I wanted a clear mind but I’m still left with this think haze,

 still dreaming I can have everything i ever wanted. 

The poem for us

We were born,
With the permanent temporality.
Yet somehow thinking we could escape,
This dream hazed reality.
And everything we used, to delay
Inevitably led to our decay.
As we sit there being ignorant of the day,
Where the sun won’t rise,
The sun won’t set,
The stars won’t shine,
And our minds forget.
With everything you ever lived for,
Revealed as it was,
And we realized,
Evading time is a lost cause

everything that i thought, wasn’t

You took my hands and feet,

and they perished in the snow.

And i just sat there and wondered,

if everything that i used to know, was everything I needed.

depths of insanity

I held my self down,

down to the depths of the ocean.

And what I found,

was this empty sort of notion.

If everything else faded,

and all i had was you.

would be there with me,

if your everything faded too? 

I once ate 10 hamburgers.
Yet you’ve still given me more heart problems.

in all of the world

She interlocked her fingers with mine

and for a minute it felt like i was holding the stars.

With all the time in the world together, she asked,

"I wonder where you are",

and for a moment i was perplexed, with this random inquiry of position.

and i replied, fingers still interlocked 

"I’m still figuring out if this is real or fiction".

Never brush your hair in rainy areas

Never brush your hair in rainy areas

whispering sweet illusions

She loved the whispers of his mind, 
attempting to explore the universe in which he would lose himself.

Everything that SHOUTED simplicity was erased and re-etched with depth and conspiracy.

Everything was not as it seemed, the chase of an illusion.

Soon she was lost between the parallels of fake and reality.

nothing is ever as it seems. 

in a library

I day dreamt of you once,

between the flicking of pages, pens and things that have faded.

all in a blink

People beginning night celebrations,
through the stations of patients, reading through galations.

And i fade it from black and white,

with the constant blink of an eye.
The windows to my soul,
so you can know it all. 

But i don’t want you to know every dark crevice in my chest,
the cest pool they call your heart.
That was once pure. 

Untouched water but now tainted.
Im tainted and always will be.
These thoughts will be left at the alter, to die and rot as i walk free in open arms.

C.S. Lewis. Dedicated his book, ‘the Screwtape letters’ to this man right here. So cool!

C.S. Lewis. Dedicated his book, ‘the Screwtape letters’ to this man right here. So cool!

fire in the whole

standing on un even ground

with tides ebbing between my toes.

What do you mean?

i just can’t understand who i am

what i am

why am i here

what is my purpose

where do i go 

where have i come from?

why can’t i be normal?

my eyes burnt with desire and my heart sunk into the shallows.

One finger held high in reverse

restless intentions of disclosed decisions that reflected all the broken stitches holding my skin. 

holding in all my past that wanted flow onto the street and into your mind.

Im sorry that i caused you pain. 

Im sorry that ill never change.

lovers talk

you kept saying i love you till all you could taste was dust and dried bones